Deadlines after deadlines
Reports after Reports
They're piling up till mountain top
They used to say pull through 2nd year,
Third year is like a breeze.
No exams, only tests and clinics.
But it's not like a breeze.
It's some tornado.
It's threatening, its like a trap.
It swept us off ground and we're trapped inside.
You never know if you can graduate year 3
You dunno what kind of grades you get for clinic
You dunno what is ahead of you.
You can't escape.
It has devastating effect
It will made u repeat a year when were caught off guard
You see your friends slowly not being in the same year as you
Simply to say, you foward modules
I'm so stressed up recently
FYP, Projects, Assignment and coming Tests
India Trip coming up and no holidays
NPCC matters, family matters, friend matters
I thought I had enough matters
But love matters came
I wanted a listening ear
A shoulder to lie on
A person to hug and cry
A person to encourage me
And be on my side and not shoot me
I used to think I'm always right
With mindset all set right
But along the rocky path all the mindset seems wrong
I couldn't tell right from wrong
I remembered when I was a child,
I was taught righteous, responsibility and empathy
But along the way into adulthood,
Righteous and empathy turned into flaws.
When you are nice to others, others may not.
When you make use of them, then they'll be wary.
When you treat them too well, they take you for granted.
You suddenly treat them badly, they'll learn their lesson and treasure you.
Being responsible is not enough.
You need to be sensible.
Sensible enough to know what to do.
Know what is appropriate.
What is really important to you.
I guess I dunno what I have in life.
What is important?
Character? Job? Studies? Relationships? Family? Friends?
What have I achieved in this 19 years of my life?
Nothing came across my mind. Nothing big to boast about.
I have so much to say, but no one to hear.
I wanted to shout, but it would be loud.
I just want to lie on your shoulder and sob.
Tell you all my stories and share my worries.
But all you did was shut me up and told me I was wrong.
You sounded like my mindset is all wrong, thinking is wrong, everything is wrong.
When I voiced out, you said now everything sound like you're wrong.
So much wrongs, so much wronged, maybe from the start being together was a wrong.
I have changed, you have changed, just like you said,
It's the new generation, you can't do anything to change.
We are just normal people, leading normal lives,
We are not capable enough to change things.
We can't help people solve their conflicts, just leave it.
We can't even cope with our studies, why bother about others?
Why don't you care about yourself more?
But am I even wrong to try?
Even if I know the chances are low,
If I try, I have no regrets, coz I've tried.
Chances are low, so don't try,
that's simply not my style.
Am I wrong to put in my best
Am I wrong to even try knowing it may be futile
Am I wrong to be upset when you commented on my feelings
Am I wrong to not give you morning call like last time
Am I wrong to call you when you just reached home
Am I wrong to call you when you are busy
Am I wrong to have chosen you
Am I wrong to love you
Am I wrong to hate you
Am I wrong to be myself
Am I wrong to cry
Am I wrong to be stress
Am I wrong to be academically poor
Am I wrong to be nice
Am I wrong to be not nice
Am I Am I Am I Am I...
I am tired. I'll go to bed now and shut down my brain. I think I thought enough and should not think anymore...
